Favorite Things // v. 3

1. Audio Books

I have read a ton over the past couple years, but lately I’ve been listening to audio books more than regular books, and it’s nice to be able to listen while I get other things done.

2. Wearable breast pumps.

This one is super specific, but where I’m at right now. I’m exclusivly pumping for Ollie, we just couldn’t get him to latch without much pain, and my husband and sister convinced me to buy the Willow Go pump, it’s without cords, and has a battery, and it’s been life changing. I can move around the house, pump in the car, jump up to wipe little bums, and am not tied to the couch for 4+ hours a day.

3. Bible 180 Challenge Journal by Hallie Leigning

It’s a Bible reading journal, to accompany her Read the Bible in 180 days Plan. It seemed a little overwhelming at first, to read the whole Bible in just 6 months, but I’m 19 days in, and finding it really manageable, and super interesting to read the Bible chronologically. The journal just makes in easy to jot down some takeaways and thoughts from the daily reading, and I think it will be super cool to look back at what I was learning/noticing throughout the whole Bible.

4. Doing my nails.

I haven’t kept up with doing my nails in months, but it’s always been something I enjoyed, helps me feel put together. I put on a sticker manicure this week, and it’s just made me feel elegant. I think I am going to give press on nails another try.

5. Super skinny, super high rise jeans.

I walked into Old Navy and the sales lady asked if I needed help, and I asked for the most high rise jeans she had. After lamenting to my sister that I now need jeans that go up past my belly button, I have worn them out several times, and they are amazing. They stay put, don’t gape, and I’m not hiking them back up all day long.

6. Playing games with my kids.

They are just starting to be ready to play games, and we are having fun learning go fish and slap jack. Their attention spans last about 3 minutes, but we have a lot of fun!

7. Less toys.

We are moving soon, so I’m slowly packing, and this week I packed up half the kids toys, and it’s been a game changer. There is far less clutter scattered across the house, and the kids don’t seem to even miss them. I think we will downsize, and set up a toy rotation system to help us keep less toys on the floor!

8. Batching food for lunch.

I made a huge batch of quinoa and egg rolls in a bowl on Monday, and it’s been so nice to have it to grab every day. Would love suggestions for other batch meal ideas!

9. Flannel shirts.

I’ve been influenced by my little sisters styles, and I am loving flannel with leggings and with jeans. It looks cute, and is super practical for pumping!

What are some things you’ve been loving lately?

Love,

Becca

When Life is Overwhelming

I’m trying to catch up.

Always behind. Always something to do. Check. Next. Check. Next.

Didn’t get that done. Do it tomorrow.

Should have got it done anyway. Don’t have time.

All I want is to clean the kitchen. But someone has needed me every time I’ve tried to start.

Stressing. Anxious thoughts. Grumpy. Cluttered.

I’m choosing to take a deep breath and step back. Recognizing the season of life I am in. Postpartum, newborn, pumping, toddlers. It’s a lot going on in our house all at once. I’m feeling behind and stressed about housework and getting dinner cooked at a reasonable hour. And I’m struggling with feeling like I’m a bad mom because there is always a pile of laundry waiting for me now, and perpetual dishes in the sink. I’m overwhelmed with the clutter, but also realizing that it’s just toys on the floor, scattered by happy toddlers playing with each other.

This transition from two to three kids has been a lot harder than I anticipated. Hard doesn’t equal bad, and we don’t regret having another baby at all, but it has not been the smooth transition we experienced with the birth of one second child. (Even though the months after that were also tough with PPA.) Our toddlers are go-go-go from the moment they awaken, and I often feel touched out by 8:00am.

This is a work in progress, learning to be a mom of toddlers, while also moving with the pace of a newborns needs.

I’m trying to set some new daily rhythms, figuring out our new schedule, and how to fit the still important to us things, alongside the new important things, like naps and pumping for Ollie.

Some things that are really helping during this overwhelming season are.

1. A clear morning routine. I follow a ritual of journal, Bible reading and writing a to-do and grateful list every single morning and it is very grounding to start the day off this way.

2. Nap time is sacred. We are unavailable from 12:30-2:30 every single day. The kids will be sleeping, and I will be sitting on the couch holding my sleeping baby for at least 45 minutes. I love contact naps, and this is the only time in the day for a few minutes to sit completely still and be calm. I’m giving myself permission to ignore the laundry and dishes for that time while I just hold Ollie.

3. Taking my supplements and getting outside. These two practices have made such a tremendous difference in my life, and they will forever be a priority.)

4. Less screen time. We got through the immediate postpartum healing phase with lots of screens. I was so thankful for that option so that my body could heal, and I could figure out pumping, and now we are working on finding ways to get through the day without needing the screens. It’s taking some times to detox, particularly for the 4 year old. But it’s good for us.

We are moving in just a few weeks, so I think that has also been adding to my overwhelming feelings, but I’m also looking forward to the process of gong through things and simplifying even more.

I am so grateful for the last couple years. I have had to learn a lot about simplicity, and living with less, (our apartment is tiny!) and being comfortable with making changes to adapt to our needs.

What are some things you’re learning or working on this year?

Love

Becca

On Skipping Grocery Pick-up

I love to listen to podcasts and audio books. I’m a young mom, and don’t have a lot of friends or social outlets at this point in my life, so I tend to listen to something audio when I need a break from the being-home-alone-with-toddlers-24-7 overwhelm.

I like mom podcasts, and enjoy learning about parenting. Being a mom is hard, and it’s helpful to find resources to work through issues we’re facing with our kids.

So last week I turned on an episode and the ladies commented about how hard shopping is with young kids, and how lucky they are to live in an era of grocery pickup, because they don’t have to live through the struggle with toddlers that their moms did.

Oof. First of all, shopping with toddlers is so hard. I am extremely thankful that pickup orders are possible, it’s so convenient to drive up, pop the trunk and drive home.

BUT. I think avoiding social situations like shopping with young kids is doing them (and yourself) a big disservice. Every outing is a training opportunity and avoiding the hard situations means that your child isn’t going to learn how they are expected to behave in a store, restaurant, or place of business. Instead of learning early, it’s going to be impossible to run errands or shop as they get bigger/louder, because they just didn’t learn how to behave in a social setting. (And the tantrums will get bigger if they’re not addressed and worked through as toddlers.)

All of this is to say:

1. Don’t be afraid to take your kids with you, even when you know it’ll be hard. The work will pay off later when your kiddos are able to be respectful in businesses, and have FUN learning life skills with you! (And don’t worry, shopping is stressful for me too right now, I’m right there with you, there is a 100% chance that either Tori or I will cry in the store or the car on the way home. )

2. Let’s give lots of grace to the mamas in the store/restaurant/church who are dealing with those toddlers meltdown. She’s made the decision to push through the hard and embarrassment of meltdowns and tears to help her kiddo learn how to navigate social situations, and snarky comments/judgmental stares and unsoliced advice are not helpful or edifying in anyway! In fact, having someone tell me “you’re doing great,” or “keep it up, it gets easier!” Is literally something that will brighten my entire day!

Keep it up mama!

Love, Becca

It’s okay to Ask for Help

Yesterday last year Tori was having surgery on her eye.

It was a really hard day for me. Handing my 7 week old baby off to a nurse, and walking out of the room was torture. I had a panic attack in the room, and the second nurse gave me a hug, even though she wasn’t supposed to.

It took a little over 3 hours. We sat 4 floors down, waiting for a phone call from the surgeon, and then for the nurses to let me come up. They won’t let you stay with your children as they wake up, and the nurse told me they waited too long to call me, so by the time I got up to her, she was hysterical, and it took over an hour to calm her down.

With her birthday last month, and coming up on the holidays, I’ve been thinking about where we where this time last year. It was such a joyful time, with a newborn, getting to watch Liam become and thrive as a big brother. We were so in love with our little family.

But it was also the hardest time. Looking back makes me so sad too. Between her eye surgery/appointments/care and the tongue tie issues/pumping/bottle feeding and just being postpartum in general, I feel like I completely missed her newborn stage. We were up every 2 hours every night for 4 months, trying to keep her weight and my supply up, and when you’re sleep deprived, everything melds together. It’s just a blur. There wasn’t enough time to just soak up the newborn snuggles, and it hurts that it is gone so fast and forever.

It’s strange that something can be both the most magical happy time, but also the hardest and darkest time too.

All this is to say 2 things:

1. Soak up the little moments with your kids. They grow and learn so fast. Slow down, when you’re able, hold them longer, they’re only little for a couple years, and then they’re independent little people.

2. The hard times don’t last forever. Things will get better. So if you’re struggling, it’s okay to slow down, and go into survival mode for a while. Ask for help, and then actually let them help!

Love,

Becca Weston

To the moms of toddlers: (or the mom who is overwhelmed.)

Parenting has been really hard for me this year. It’s been hard for a combination of the season we’re in, (toddlerhood, with a baby, postpartum, Scott works a ton, we are living in a very small space, just a lot of things.).

Even though we are younger statistically than the average parents these days, I don’t think we had crazy expectations that parenting was going to be a breeze… I’ve been around toddlers and babies my whole life, and knew there are seasons where it is just hard. What has been unexpected has been the overwhelm of always onto the next thing. You get potty training down, they go through a sleep regression. You get them sleeping again, and they start having meltdowns in public, you work through the meltdowns, and they try to give up naps even though they desperately need them daily…. Always something hard. At least that’s where we are at. Last night alone I got up 6 different times to deal with kid needs, and by the time the alarm went off at 5:30 I could have cried I was so exausted.

And this is totally normal;

this is toddlerhood.

I’ve been really discouraged lately, especially by the comments I have been getting, and hearing from other young mamas. They are from moms of older kids who are no longer in the thick of toddler hood and babies, essentially it’s “ I am so glad I’m not there anymore,” or “I’m watching these young moms with their kids and just so glad that I don’t have littles anymore, it’s just looks miserable.”

And every time I hear someone say this, whether it’s to me or to someone else, it’s just so disheartening. I understand being thankful you’re past this stage of parenting, but vocalizing that in such a negative way is really damaging to the moms who are in the young children stage of parenting right now.

So this is for the mama of toddlers.

You are doing amazing! I see you being consistent, patient and loving even when it’s frustrating and exhausting. I see you holding back tears while you handle yet another meltdown. I see you alone, supervising your kids at every social function. This is really hard, but I can see you’re doing your best! And it’s 1000% worth it when your kid smiles up at you, or hands you the weed they picked. When they loudly announce “me happy!” Or cuddle up in your lap! So keep going, it’s just a season, and the seasons change eventually.